I love to be alone because I find comfort in loneliness.

Ahh its almost 3am and why am I still wide awake? Hah. No need to ask. But why nostalgic now? It's not any special month of ours soo why did you pop up into my mind eh?

I wanna ask you something. But if only you will reply me, or even give me a way to contact you. Okay seriously. Which sister doesn't know how to contact her own brother? Though not siblings by blood, but sure we are siblings by heart yea?

I wanna ask you, but I don't know how to. Shall I wait till year end like usual? But you won't reply. Or do you actually read them? Hah. Not like you will tell me. Seriously where did all those days went? Im just so afraid now, of being alone. Of losing my only laughter and smile. Cause to tell the truth , ever since I found out the only true friend/bro is Edmond, haha I don't think I smiled truthfully.

But you nope. Your life is going on smoothly as per normal. As per how it's supposed to be. Without me. But what about me?

Nobody finds me, nobody asks for me, nobody even bothers about me. I can stay alone forever but no one will ever find out. Hah. Pathetic me.

I really wanna get an answer from you okay. So would you prettyplease reply to my year end messages I've been sending since primary six? It makes me feel so unwelcomed, so worthless to find out that I've poured out my heart and soul to someone I don't even know who feels the same towards me. Hah. Stop even dreaming Ariel.

I guess I'll pray every night, for your health. For your happiness together. And yes I wont leave out Edmond. You two mean so much to me. Sometimes even more than myself. Maybe one day you will find out that nobody else cares for you more than I do. Just maybe.

Sleep well, I'll protect you, not by your side, but I'll always be with you mentally. Through thick or thin. I'll be there. I promise.

And I'll swear to God that this promise, I will never break. So trust me. Rely on me. I'll be your support, Ill be your pillar. I'll be anything for you. So trust me.

Live well Charles. I'll be there for you.