I love to be alone because I find comfort in loneliness.

She's probably already feeling very conflicted inside. In a situation when she cannot even be clear of what she is thinking, how is she supposed to give people answers? Besides, out of the people how asked her "Are you okay?", how many of them were sincere and genuinely want to know the answer? There are so many out there who really don't give a damn and may even secretly curse for her downfall. Our superficial society makes it difficult for her to tell fakes apart. So is she just supposed to trust everyone who asked her that question? Or should she shun from them all? Her brain is too tired to think, and so she chose the easiest path - put up a smile, keep on telling herself that she is fine, and pray that she can quickly be so truly.

She doesn't want to be seen as a weakling. She doesn't want to be seen as someone who cannot keep her composure during difficult times. Damn, she doesn't even want to feel this way. So, she will blame it all on you, she'll try to convince herself that the outcome was nothing she could control and is not her fault. What she didn't know is that by doing so, she is building a wall so high, so thick, around herself. It is so difficult to get to her, she may think she is alone in the world. And so again to cover up this loneliness, she chose to smile, to pretend to be happy, to pretend she is unaffected at all, to pretend that she doesn't need you. But truthfully, she needs you to scream it to her, to knock some sense into her, that someone, anyone is there, and will always be there for her. Her pride forbids her to make the first move. Thus causing her to lose friendships one at a time. She ironically smiles to cover up her loneliness.

God you left her so broken, soulless even. She wonders how could she allow you to affect her so deeply. She tries to recall when did she give you the permission to do so. She smiles because she thinks it's too absurd. She is killing herself for not loving herself properly. She shouldn't be a broken toy off the shelves after an adventure. But to appeal to future customers, she painted over the scratches, then bubble wrapped the toy. She doesnt forget to draw on a smiling face. After years of repair, she place the toy back on the shelf and thought deeply.

She finally realize that she belongs to herself. She has to take responsibility for her heart, her mind, her soul. And so, she smiled. Only this time, her smile is different. This smile is one of confidence, of self-love, of protection. This smile, after all the others, is genuine and a sign to prove that she has grown up. This smile may be the brightest she gave the world, and she vowed to never forget how she got to this smile.